Lone

Today I feel lonely. Of all the people I have lost over the years, goodbyes do not get any easier. It seems like saying hello again is even harder though. Actually letting someone into the recesses of your being when you can personally testify that you have lost the majority of people who mean the most to you is an uphill battle. To love radically, you have to be intentionally insane sometimes or risk the crazier, albeit easier, role of being alone. So Lord, I lay myself bare before you, to the depths of my scarred, raw heart. It is yours. For love, for loneliness, to be filled or to be patient. You designed us to need people around us to keep us longing for heaven. So even if goodbyes will be my outcome in every relationship I have, I will keep trying, giving, loving, and opening. Your will be done in me, Lord.